OK, I'm going to do it. I'm going to add Evans to my list of places to find decent clothes if you're chunky. I know I have slated them but I actually dared enter those hallowed store floors again this weekend, in search of some tights - because I always admitted they are pretty good for thick, chunky and patterned tights - but I actually bought something else while I was there...a funky cardi-coat that's just perfect for the cool but not-yet-freezing autumn days.

Get yourself over to Evans before news gets out that they are actually looking quite good this season!  For a night out there's this lovely flattering square necked black top, which will look sexy with jeans or dressed up with a skirt. The jewelled pencil skirt would look fabulous with it, ans add a pair of Evans' black fishnet tights and you've got a slightly burlesque and very omn-trend look going on.

If you just want to cuddle up in something cosy, you could do worse than the poncho jumper which would look good with a maxi skirt or even, if you dare, some plain black leggings (it's nice and long!)

Just when my star was beginning to fade and the tabloids started to get to me, I opened up Grazia and there was Beth Ditto at the Swarovski Fashion Rocks event last week, absolutely rockin' the fat and proud look.

Designed by Christopher Kane, the dress looked absolutely fabulous on Beth, who as ever was nonchalant about the fact that every other skinny female had probably been starving all week long to get into their frock.

Naomi, Donatella and Uma all looked lovely, but Beth was working the goth look with a smile and rumoured to be wearing spangly knickers under the dress which she hinted at revealing - but decided to spare her blushes and retain a bit of mystery instead.

Beth on body  image

"Imperfections are funny and not just funny but normal, they are human,' I really don't understand why people try so hard to fight them. I don't believe in perfect because it doesn't exist.''

"Regardless of what people say about me or what they think about fat people, I really do like my body  It works for me. It gets up out of the bed in the morning. It is talented. It does things and I am really proud of those things."

Something about today...well the past week...has got me hovering over diet websites. I know damn well that diets are the devil's spawn and Weight Watchers are to blame for women (and men) weeing until they've wrung out the last drop on weigh-in days then scoffing a zillion calories in junk food as soon as they've been on the scales. So I tried to analyse why it was that I was feeling so crap when my mantra is supposed to be so positive.

And it's obvious really. Another week of open season on fat people, it's not hard to tell where my sapped self esteem has disappeared to, is it? I'll bet I'm not the only person who's felt a creeping sense of unease after seeing that now the government are going to write to parents of fat kids and tell them off (that was this morning's effort anyway). It's enough to make even the most strident love-thyself proponent feel...well..bloody miserable. That's going to be great for kids isn't it? I can hear it now, "Have you had your fat kid letter yet?" in the playground. Well I suppose it's more original than 'speccy four-eyes' or 'ginger nut'

What do the Nanny State actually think they will get from all this anti-fat propaganda? Contrary to popular media stereotyping, we are NOT all greedy, lazy or stupid. I've been up since seven working on a freelance project, I'm supposed to do four hours for them but I finished at 2:30. That'll be a full day's work, then. I had a late lunch break in which I walked about a mile into the city, did some shopping and walked back. Then I did some more work, did a few blog entries, and now here I am. Must be time for dinner soon - Do the Mary Poppins food police want to know what this greedy pig has eaten today?

Breakfast: One small slice of toast with Marmite
Lunch: About half a Food Doctor bagel with cheese, mug of tomato soup
Snacks: Packet of Sun Bite crackers, one ginger biscuit
About three cups of coffee
Lots of water

No pies or lard in sight! OK, some days I eat more, but I don't need to be lectured by the government about my food intake!  I honestly really dislike a lot of fast food too. I do like pizza and the occasional Indian takeaway but KFC is too salty and I hate it, and I can't remember the last time I had McDonalds or Burger King as I think they are minging. So why am I fat?

Well, dieting for twenty years probably screwed up my eating patterns good & proper. I don't get as much exercise as I could because I'm always sat on my bum working at the moment. And I ate a lot in the past. But demonising fat people, making us feel horrible about the way we look, frightening us into thinking we are all going to die horribly and poking fun at anyone who puts on an ounce in the media is ot going to make us thinner...is it?

I'm blatantly stealing some material from another blog - because I just ranted myself out and I know she won't mind!

"This might sound irrational but think about it - food, weight issues, calories, resistance, guilt, self reproach, shame, stress and internal argument have filled your mind up for so much of your life that to imagine a future where it has gone makes you feel like there is a huge gap or hole and you can’t conceive of finding anything else interesting enough to fill it.

It can be a really frightening experience.

There is nothing to be afraid of. When you start to gain real control over food and your self esteem goes up and you start to look outwards at life instead of back in at yourself, your life fills up naturally with all of the exciting things that it should have been filled with in the first place. There is no void or gap or hole – it’s an illusion.

To stop overeating and end all of its nasty side effects is not frightening, it’s like waking up from an anaesthetic – you suddenly realise what it actually feels like to be alive. As long as you’re in the overeating trap, you’ll never know the reality of living because you’re stuck behind a wall that blocks any real experience and all you feel is a dull sort of grey boredom and the only real thing that can make you feel anything is food."

Read more here

Are you fat?

Then hang your head in shame, as it's been open season for the fat-o-phobics this week. Firstly we have the Daily Mail (always a favourite, they love to have the word 'obese' on their front page as much as they like to have the word 'immigrant' on there...) screaming that obesity is worse than smoking. Is that because fewer smokers get old enough to develop the obesity-related diseases we are all prone to getting if we take our eyes off of the scales?

Apparently "An obese person dies on average nine years earlier than somebody of normal weight, while a very obese person's life is cut short by an average of 13 years." Maybe they just get bored with the constant lectures?

And when Dr Susan Jebb of the Medical Research Council said that "in this obesogenic environment, it was surprising that anyone was able to remain thin, and so the notion of obesity simply being a product of personal over-indulgence had to be abandoned for good." it really incensed the Mail, and its readers. The comments on Max Hastings rant actually deserve to be reproduced, after I've picked his rant to pieces.

Apparently, he saw two women stuffing their faces at Wimbledon over the summer and wanted to tell them not to do it, because they were wrecking their lives. Well, I can't comment on why the women were scoffing their way through the tennis (mind you, it did rain a lot so they may have just been bored waiting for the play to resume...) but what I can say is that later on, Max tells us that:

"We are not remotely obsessed with health - Ms Primarolo (Heath Minister) would blow a fuse if she knew how much we drink every night. We simply want to be able still to see our feet over our stomachs when we get to 70."

Doesn't matter about the fact you openly admit to pickling your liver, and may not even get to 70, then? It's OK to drink too much because nobody can see you and judge you for it. Such a blatant hypocrite as well as an insufferable snob. He goes on to say that:

"One seldom, if ever, meets anyone rich and obese. The rich know better. They employ personal trainers, and keep whole rooms full of exercise equipment and rowing machines.

A cyclist is more likely to be a software tycoon than a shop assistant. Most upmarket women cherish their figures to the point of obsession. It is the less well-off, the less educated, who have succumbed disastrously to the cult of - to hell with the Medical Research Council, let us use the word - self-indulgence."

So, drinking too much isn't self indulgent? And what an arrogant prat. Where I come from, a cyclist is more likely to be a student than anything else, and as for being poor and badly educated, well I believe it's Mr Hastings that is showing his own ignorance here. I am neither poor (nor rich) or stupid, but I'm fat. How does he explain that paradox? Am I not an upmarket woman just because I'm not thin? I like to think of myself as very upmarket, thank you very much!

But even better than this smug diatribe are the comments that 'readers' have added in support.

• "Obese adults cannot claim that they have no moral agency when it comes to buying and consuming food, but have moral agency when it comes to other life decisions, such as voting marrying and so on. Moral agency cannot be switched on and off at will"
  So...if you're fat you shouldn't be allowed to get married, or vote. Nice logic there...obviously calorie-deprived.(in case you aren't sure, Moral agency is "a person's capacity for making moral judgments and taking actions that comport with morality.")
• "Obesity IS linked to laziness. People will use a car for a hundred yard drive to call in their shop for a newspaper"
  I don't know anybody who does that, do you?
• "Laziness, the inability to learn anything that takes effort to acheive, the poor me culture, and the inability to take any responsibility for their own actions, thosse that follow this route only have themselves to blame."
  It gets better - now we're unable to learn anything and unable to take responsibility for ourselves. Oh dear.
• "most fat people have a self-inflicted disability and it is their choice whether to address this or not."
  Are you annoyed yet? I don't consider myself in any way diabled. My ability to walk everywhere, swim non-stop until I get wrinkly fingers and workout in the gym would suggest that there's no physical impairment. But I do have a dodgy ankle. Does that count?
• And, my personal favourite: "Just another way nature sorts out the fittest and those with the strongest will power from the rest. Natural selection at work. Life is still full of dangers despite the human race coming so far - drugs, alcohol, gun crime and gang violence - and now the threat of obesity. Those strong enough or wise enough will survive"
  Now fat people are as much of a threat as hoodies and gun crime! Oh, and this comment is ignoring a basic biological fact - sweetheart, who's going to last longer in a famine, a 15 stone woman or a 7 stone woman? Not being funny, but will power wouldn't do you any good if you were starving to death.

  If you feel like commenting - you can add your thoughts here:

"FEWER than one in ten women who lose weight by dieting manage to keep it off, according to a survey published today."

How many more times will a survey come up with those same results? And how many people will carry on dieting anyway? Does it really make any sense?

Only nine per cent diet 'successfully' while the remaining 91 per cent put the fat back on and are doomed to a cycle of calorie counting for the rest of their lives.

Researchers found women used a range of substances - including class A drugs - to lose weight.

Almost four out of 10 (37 per cent) had tried slimming pills, laxatives (26 per cent) and amphetamine or cocaine (15 per cent).

The survey of 2,000 people, commissioned by magazine Now, revealed only two per cent of those questioned were happy with their body.

Maybe THAT is what's so frightening about the 'obesity epidemic' - women hate themselves so much that they are prepared to risk their health with drug abuse instead?

For many years, it seemed that thin was always in if you wanted to be anywhere near fashionable. Now we have wonderful PROPER fashion designers like Anna Scholz, though, we can rest assured that we at least have one person fighting for the notion that big girls love to look good too.

Anna Scholz was, like many 13-year-old girls, including me, obsessed with fashion when growing up in the style-obsessed 80s. . But Anna had a bit of a problem - she was just over six feet tall and a size 16. There's no embarassing  ra-ra skirt photos in Anna's family collection - some may say that's more of a bonus than a problem...

 Although she wasn't happy with her lot, fashion wise.

"My mum used to drag me round the shops and all we could find [that fit] were these old ladies' clothes, or menswear," she says now. "So I started sewing."

Nearly 25 years on, after a stint as a plus-size model, Scholz is one of the world's only plus-size designers at the top end of the market. She uses Vogue models for her publicity shots, and her pieces - some priced at several hundred pounds - are sold in Harrods and Selfridges. Her gorgeous website screams expensive, flattering taste...no voluminous tents in sight.

The only difference between her and her design contemporaries is that while their sizes tend to stop at 14, her clothes go all the way up to size 28.

Scholz, now a size 26 herself, is angry that her world -  the fashion world - still has won't tolerate models or clothes above a size 14. 

"You can't read an interview in a magazine now without a mention of what the celebrity ate for lunch - I really don't want to know! Why do we need to point it out whenever somebody eats something? Are we now already presuming that she has an eating disorder?"

Scholz has dressed a number of larger-than-average celebrities, including Macy Gray, Dawn French, Roseanne Barr, Alison Moyet and Queen Latifah, yet the transition has yet to be made on to the catwalk at British, Continental or American fashion week shows. With rare exceptions such as Sophie Dahl (who, when she was discovered, was presented as a statuesque and gorgeous size 16, but has since shrunk down to a size 8), and American Crystal Renn - a size 14 who was until recently the face of Scholz's collection and has now signed up to be the new face of high street chain Evans - most designers tend to make no secret of the fact that they do not enjoy dressing larger women.

"People are really quite arrogant ... they have all these misconceptions that bigger women don't care about their appearance and have let themselves go, therefore they're not going to spend money on clothes," says Scholz accusingly. "It's really harsh. Not everyone in the industry thinks like that, but lots of designers do."

During her career as a plus-size model, she found that having to model the pitiful offerings of plus-size clothing for women led to some pretty horrific crimes of fashion.

Not surprisingly, she gave up on modelling and in enrolled at the Central St Martins College of Art and Design in London to study fashion design, tutored alongside future industry stars Giles Deacon, Julien Macdonald and Tristan Webber. The snooty tutors were not particularly interested in my plus sizes, and Anna had to make her own bigger blocks for patterns, as the other blocks at college were a size 10.

Anna's determined attitude paid off. Her end-of-year fashion show, the only plus-size one to be staged that year, received a standing ovation. After graduation she opened a boutique in west London's trendy Portobello Road, which she ran with two fellow fashion graduates, and was able to put on a few trade shows with the help of a grant from the Prince's Trust. Her big break came when the American plus-size chain store Lane Bryant placed a huge order. Even so,  Britain's top fashion buyers still seemed to look down thewir perfectly-formed noses at her.

Scholz's collections are now stocked in Selfridges and Harrods alongside the likes of Prada, Dolce & Gabbana and Alexander McQueen. One of this season's Scholz pieces, a gold-coloured swing coat, is one of Harrods' top 20 best-selling womenswear items.

Julien Macdonald, the sequin-loving young Welsh designer beloved of red-carpet regulars attacked the culture of skinny during London Fashion Week, saying that icons of thin such as Kate Moss  looked like "your 12-year-old daughter dressed up".

Macdonald is also one of those high-end designers who have opted to produce high street ranges: for several years he has made an affordable seasonal diffusion line for Designers At Debenhams, which goes up to a size 20.

Scholz is hoping that things will improve for plus size fashionistas, although she's realistic 

"I don't know if we'll ever see someone like Vogue, Marie Claire or Elle doing a shoot with bigger models without making a big hoo-ha about it." she says.

Despite oozing confidence about her size, Scholz admits to having the occasional down day herself when it comes to looking and feeling good.

"I don't think any woman is ever happy with her size," she points out. "One day you'll feel great and then you have another when you feel horrible and fat. But I've never been slim and I've always been quite happy being curvy and Amazonian. Like most people, though, if my clothes fit me loosely I'm much happier than if they're a bit tight."

She's pleased with what she's achieved in the plus-size market so far, but thinks more can be done. "I just want people to accept diversity more," she says. "And that should be the same with different ages and races. That's what the world is like, after all. We should be portraying it as it is a little more often."

Amen to that!

Lizzie Doyle has had the same problem most bigger women have at one time or another. At a  size 18, she was very tired of not being able to wear decent clothes.

"As any of you who are a size 16 or over will know, it's soul-destroying to walk down any high street and see all the fabulous, colourful clothes on offer and know that if you walk into any of those stores, you'll get the "Oh no, Madam. We don't stock your size!" answer."

(See the post about Next and their shop floor policy of hiding the odd size 18 and 20 on the racks but NEVER a 22...No, madam, you have to get that from the catalogue..."

Lizzie decided that the very proactive answer to the perennial problem was to start her own business and create the sort of clothes she wanted to wear!

"So many of my friends (even the ones I class as the skinny ones!) talk about how difficult it is to find clothes that actually fit. You know the thing I mean - the t-shirt that rides halfway up your tummy when you bend over or reach up; the trousers that are actually verging on indecent, they're so low cut; the other trousers that come with a silly tiny button on the top that pops off the minute you put them on; or the skirt that cuts off your circulation, the waist band's so tight."

Lizzie shares my opinion on some fat girl clothing emporiums (mentioning no names *cough* Evans *cough* and calls them the "how ugly can we make the fat people look" shops!

We all know the ones she means, they ideally want you to wear smocks in a myriad of garish colours (or black) but failing that, they think you should be in black man-made fibres, only available in deeply unflattering cuts, which you're expected to pay large amounts of money for. Just what you've always wanted!

Lizzie said no to all that - and her aim is to bring you great staples and basics that are a great fit, in lovely colours and fabrics, and that you can wear time after time.  The website is mainly wardrobe staples - but includes a few higher fashion items in the latest coluors and styles that  change every few weeks.

The company sources all fabrics except for one imported silk in the UK, and to add to the eco-friendly home grown vibem their factories are based within the London area, with the exception of knitwear which is made in Scotland and Wales.  No far east sweatshops for Lizzie! So....you pay a bit more, but the designs and quality are top notch and at least Lizzie knows what she - and presumably other people who are looking for an alternative to badly cut 'plus size' versions of high street fashion want.

Get some serious Lizzie style with the fabulous Jackie O coat (I'm sorely tempted myself) and the wide legged linen trousers, which are a pretty hot catwalk trend this winter. And when your slim friends ask where you got them, just smile enigmatically...

From Queen Simply Be, that's quite a cliche...but bear with me.

Have you ever thought that it's dieting and fear of getting fat that keeps you from being everything you want to be? Hell, I'm only human...I get depressed in shopping malls, especially when I realise that there are shops full of lovely things to wear that I am excluded from just because I don't fit in with the 'brand' or the proprietor's idea of what a woman who wears her/his clothes should look like.

The trouble is, all the time we wish we were someone else, looked like someone else, or try to fit in with the narrow acceptable parameters for the female form (for example if Angelina Jolie is too thin and Britney Spears is now too fat, where does that leave anyone who doesn't fit the extremely narrow measurements of what's actually OK?) we're not being who we are.

It's OK to want to look good. it's OK to want to be fit and healthy. It's even OK to want to be slim. But it's NOT OK that there is an entire industry of 'experts' who get rich by making us feel terrible.

Have you ever thought that it's in the interest of the big corporates like Weight Watchers to keep people returning month on month, miserable and dejected? Did you, like me, want to hurl a shoe at the telly when you saw the adverts after Christmas last year? You know, the one where husbands, children and neighbours all slag off a faceless woman for not being the woman she used to be now she's a fat cow? And what about the Lighter Life ads in buses (those of you unlucky enough to have to use them)? There was one earlier this year designed to tug at the heartstrings:

"My children think I am beautiful now I've lost six stone"

AAAAARRRGHHHHH! Talk about guilt guilt guilt. Your family, friends and neighbours will all love you more if you are thin. That's what they are saying. And it serves the diet industry well to keep people hating themselves, and telling them they have the magic bullet that will make them loved again. Why do we fall for it? They aren't doing it because they care about fat people's health. They only care about our money. The Sally Anne Voak post should convince anyone of that.

Well, I refuse to be taken in by this insidious crap any more. I've not paid a penny to Weight Watchers for their plastic food, boring magazine or pointless classes for well over 18 months now. Same goes for Slimming World and any of the others. It's time the money making self esteem bashing corporations realised that we are not ugly, worthless or stupid just because we are fat. If you agree - hit them where it hurts most - in the profits!

End of rant.

Some of you might have seen this already - if not, though, have a look!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUTJQIBI1oA

That's Joy Nash. I saw this YouTube gem months ago and it's now quite famous. Joy has been interviewed in several places online and in print and she seems like a damn cool woman.

I liked this quote:

"Well, I wrote the Fat Rant script about 6 years ago as an assignment for a Solo Performance class I was taking in college. Things were pretty crazy at the time: my best friend was dying of brain cancer, and I was really kind of pissed off at how much the rest of us had (health, opportunities, etc) and instead of using it, we sat around whining and complaining about truly inconsequential things.

I'm loving her philosophy. So what if you can't quite get your ass into a size ten? It's really not the end of the world. Maybe when people (for people, read 'the media') stop treating fat people like sympathy cases, or social rejects, they might start to see that merely taking up a few more inches on a train seat isn't actually a reason to want to slit your wrists.

Hell, if you want to lose some weight, that's fine. But don't do it because you think it's going to make your life perfect, or your personality any different. Live your life NOW and lose weight as an aside. Life is for living!

The rest of the interview is here...

.....and the award goes to Professor Jane Wardle, director of Cancer Research UK's health behaviour unit and study leader, who said:

"We found that weight gain in the population has been unequally distributed.

"Slimmer adults today are almost as slim as their counterparts 10 years ago, but the heaviest people in the population are much heavier than they were 10 years ago."

Obese people have generally got bigger in the last decade but thin people have stayed the same, the report concluded.

Let's just think about that, shall we? Perhaps you can only get SO thin before you starve yourself to death - but being fat in itself doesn't kill you (although the effects of overeating such as heart disease might) - so while people continue to get fatter...it's actually physically impossible to get too much thinner and still stay alive?

Or is it just me that thinks that?

Wahey - Homer Simpson and anyone within a five mile radius of a Krispy Kreme shop can breathe a sigh of relief...apparently doughnuts ARE good for you...

The boffins who research this sort of thing have actually discovered, much to the probable chagrin of low fat gurus like Rosemary Conley or anyone involved with the hugely profitable Atkins business that any diet rich in starch and sugar tends to leave people slimmer and healthier.

The findings fly in the face of the popular ditch-the-carbs style eating plans that have encouraged people to snack on Pepperami and sliced chicken instead of a sandwich.  Bring back the humble spud - we always loved you anyway!

Professor Glenn Gaesser claims that the anti-carbs hysteria is misguided.

His analysis of dozens of studies into the eating habits and health of hundreds of thousands of men and women failed to find that those who ate lots of carbohydrate were heavier. Instead, those who feasted on carbs were often thinner and healthier than those who severely limited their intake.

Professor Gaesser, an obesity expert from the University of Virginia, said:
 
'I found, totally contrary to current nutritional thinking, carbohydrates are not fattening.  In fact, just the opposite. There is no reason to be eating fewer carbs - they're not the enemy.'

He added that cutting back on carbs often led to eating more fatty foods, leading to weight gain.

Writing in the Journal of the American Dietetic Association, Professor Gaesser said carbohydrates play an important role in a balanced diet, providing fibre, vitamins, minerals and antioxidants.  It might be a good idea to  take his comments with a pinch of salt - well he was part funded by the baking industry - but he also said the key to weight loss was to eat fibre-rich foods, exercise regularly and eat reduced fat dairy products and lean meat.

How dull. Just like any other diet book. I guess the whole doughnut headline was probably a bit aspirational after all?

I've just been to see 'The Heartbreak Kid' and at the same time I saw the trailers for 'Good luck Chuck'

OK, I didn't expect them to be intellectual. But the Farrelly Brothers sure hate fat birds, don't they? And I know Good Luck Chuck isn't a Farrelly production but it's following the same line.

If anyone's seen 'Shallow Hal' they will know what I mean. Let's all take the piss out of fat people. Fat woman sits on chair and breaks it. Fat woman eats like a pig. Fat woman jumps in swimming pool and people run for cover. Oh ha-de-hah. That's so, like, ironic, yeah?

Course it is. Shallow Hal was a crap film anyway, but the whole premise was that the leading man, Hal, no oil painting himself, was in love with a fat woman after being hypnotised into seeing her 'true beauty' - and when she was being beautiful he saw Gwyneth Paltrow without a fat suit - when he saw the REAL woman, he saw a fat pig (Gwynnie in a fat suit, how droll)

Yes, I know, it's a stupid film. But the whole genre just annoys me. In the Heartbreak kid, there are two stand out 'laugh at the fat joke' scenes - one where the new bride introduces the new groom to her mother - and the mother is fat. And the predictable joke is - 'I'm wearing her wedding dress...yes, the very same dress SHE wore.' As we all laugh heartily about the fact that women all turn into their mothers...and he's made a BIG mistake because the mother is fat (shock, horror)

The second is even worse - it's a fat CHILD joke. The woman that Ben Stiller's character falls in love with is enjoying taking Mexican children on fairground rides with her, on her lap. Ben joins in to impress her...and ends up with token fat kid. Oh, how we laughed.

As for the trailers to Good luck Chuck - not that I'm remotely tempted to see it anyway - the story is that Chuck gets jinxed by an ex - and every woman who sleeps with him marries her next boyfriend. So of course news gets out and lots of women want to sleep with him. Because we're all THAT desperate to get married that we'll have sex with a complete loser, aren't we girls?

So far so banal. Then he meets his *true love* and wants to break the curse. So he's gonna have to find somebody that NOBODY will want to marry, huh?

Ohhhhh yes. Cue the appearance of the morbidly obese woman, having a good scratch, in a bikini on a sunlounger so we can all gawp at her true grotesqueness. If that wasn't bad enough, we switch to a shot of the pair out to dinner...and she is shovelling food in her gob like a woman posessed. With plenty of it down her chin, naturally.

Sorry, but are we to assume that if you are fat you automatically have disgusting table manners?

It just makes me angry. It's OK to stereotype fat people because it's plainly our fault, we deserve it, we're there to be laughed at by crappy film makers who are stuck for anything genuinely funny to say...so they stick in a token fat person and make them disgusting-as-you-like.

Imagine if it were a disabled person we were poking fun at? An ethnic minority? Cue sharp intake of breath and howls of outrage. But if you are fat, you're fair game.

Check it out yourself and let me know what you think: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEg4GQK5k7w

I'm pleased to say it scored highly on the Combustible Celluloid site:

"Conspicuously absent from this romantic comedy are any genuine laughs or romance. The unfunny, uninteresting Charlie (Dane Cook) has been hexed: every girl he sleeps with is destined to next meet her true love. When he falls in love with Cam Wexler (Jessica Alba), he tries to break the spell. The makers of this shameful waste of celluloid have padded their work with fat jokes, homophobic jokes, gratuitous nudity and various bodily functions, while harboring a fundamental hatred for women"

Couldn't have put that better myself.

...well, I am very pleased to see that this week, Wallis has launched a capsule collection called 'Wallis Curves'

I've always liked Wallis, they do lovely knitwear, and while I was searching for a dress or something vaguely dressy to wear for my brother's wedding in December, I noticed that Wallis are making a big splash of the new Curves collection on their website.

At the moment it's only 30-odd pieces, but most of their range does go up to a 20 anyway - and the Curves collection stretches to a 24, which is even better.

Wallis is well known for being one of the better quality high street brands, and the new collection includes tailored pieces as well as the trademark work wear and casual styles.

They've gone heavy on the monochrome - with graphic black and white prints featuring on dresses and jersey tops - plus some fantastically versatile wide-leg palazzo pants and glamorous sequin gun metal tunics. I can't wait for the collection to take off...but for now I'm a-clickin' my mouse in Wallis' direction...

...from the comfort of your own home or on the High Street. I discovered this shop locally a few years ago, and I always pop in on payday to see what they've got. I picked up a couple of lovely jumpers ready for the cold-weather-onset last week, and was chuffed to bits to find they have an online store as well, for those days when I'm feeling really lazy and can't be bothered to go out in the rain and walk to the town centre!

Yours caters for up to a size 28. They actually hit the high street in 1997, in a discount store in Felixstowe, Suffolk.  I used to shop in there when lived in Ipswich, funnily enough. The 14-32 fashions continually sold out - leaving just the smaller sizes. 

They decided to take advantage of the obvious and open a shop that catered specifically to the plus-size woman; a shop that would provide an alternative to existing High Street retailers. The store, then called Size Up, was an immediate success. They are proud of the fact that they actually listen to their clientele,

"Last year, we sold over 1.4 million items, and each of those items came with a tag on the back saying, "Tell us what you think." Now we sell three different trouser leg lengths, and our petite section is coming soon - to cater to those of us that are a little shorter."

Wahey! Someone's listening! And here's some of what you can find in store:

I'm doing something that I may well regret in a few days - reading the new book 'Waistland' by Deirdre Barrett.

Deirdre is a Harvard psychologist (so that makes her right, doesn't it?) who argues that we are all hunter gatherers lost in a jungle of burgers, sofas and TV remotes. She goes against the grain of the diet guru who tells us nicely to 'listen to our bodies' and tells us instead that we have to be cruel to be kind, and completely cut out sugary and fatty foods.

Not cut down or 'save as a treat' but eliminate forever. She thinks this will be biologically easier for us. I beg to differ - has she ever seen a compulsive eater denied chocolate cake? It's not going to be pretty.

Radical changes are necessary and, fortunately, are biologically easier than small or gradual changes in diet. Barrett tells us how to reprogram our bodies, break food addictions, and ignore our attraction to "supernormal stimuli - artificial creations that appeal to our instincts more than the natural objects they mimic."

OK, so far so scientific. But how about this, fellow chubsters?

"People like to say that willpower is either a myth-it doesn't exist-or that dieting has nothing to do with willpower. All willpower means is resolutely following through on decisions without getting derailed by short-term temptations. It's very straightforward. The most generous interpretation of why willpower gets bad press as a diet technique is that lots of people have so little of it. But it's a trainable skill."

Is that why so many people can't stick to diets, love? The old 'it's your own fault, fatso' answer? I can see this book is going to make me rant!

One more snippet:

"The 'listen to your body' argument is counter to biology. That myth is so persistent because it sounds so good-why wouldn't we be wired with instincts to tell us what's good for us? The problem is that we're wired for a much different environment-for a hunter/gatherer society. Our instincts aren't going to guide us unless we're on the savanna, away from fast food."

I'm already plotting to get her sent there. And I haven't even read the blasted book yet! Still, I'll give the book a chance. And read it while eating biscuits just to spite her!

I know the feeling.

From the extremes of 'Ten Years Younger' and 'You are what you eat' through to the no effort eat-whatever-you-like methods of Paul McKenna (who incidentally I think is fab) they are all at it, telling us to lose weight. Sometimes by eating the most bizarre combinations possible - sprouty things that taste of nothing and wallpaper paste porridge. I prefer my porridge with maple syrup or brown sugar, actually...

Sometimes the diets are subtle - like 'Cook yourself thin' which is actually not a bad thing. Just slightly altering the ingredients of a Chicken Tikka Masala can turn it from artery-clogging no-go area to a nutritious spicy plate of yumminess.

But it's still all about YOU. The diet is something that you have to do, and if you don't, you have no willpower and you are a failure...and you should be beaten about the head with a large tub of Haagen Dazs until you go off the idea of ever eating any again...

So, if that style of dieting is beginning to get on your wick, the realisation that none of them actually seem to work is dawning , but to be honest, you quite fancy losing a bit of extra poundage,  say 'Hello Girls' - or boys - to the Food Philosophy.

The Food Philosophy is a bit different. not just a 'diets; don't work but here's an EATING PLAN' type of thing, but a 'diets don't work because you are programmed to overeat as soon as you go on one - so just stop it!' sort of thing.

The brains behind the outfit, Sue Thomason, has a fantastic blog, which gives you a flavour of the course. It's worked for people who thought they'd be overeaters for good...and it works by stopping the need for overeating at it's source, and as soon as you stop over eating, you'll lose weight. I'm going to give it a try - watch this space!